parents against Intercaste marriage (Baniya and Punjabi)

Hi,

Iam a baniya. Iam in love with a punjabi guy. My parents is not at all accepting our relationship. Initially somehow i convinced my mom and dad, but then chachu went strictly against it and now everyone is against it. My dad is not well due to the tension prevailing at home.

I cannot think my life with anyone else. But now I don't see any way to convince them. Above all they are searching guy for me in a very faster pace. Please guide me so that i can make them understand how we are together.

I will not go into technical, but what about the guy's family, will they accept you ?

Regarding tension in your family, simply tell them that if they want to KILL you then why not to kill at once, why to give you slow poison by marrying you against your will and forcefully... come'on, it will be your life-long misery and pain,its you who will suffer , its you have to marry not them.

You just declare, alright as per will of my parents, I will not marry this Punjabi guy and will not even contact him ever, however, I will not even marry anyone else, will remain unmarried whole life, and if they try to marry you forcefully, you can take extreme action and can hurt yourslf.

However, I have serious advice, never make your parents feel that you are giving that boy more preference than parents, it hurts them seriously. Whenver talk about him, make sure you show that parents are above everything for you but you love this guy, you can leave this guy for them but will not ever marry. Just remember this advice.

his family is accepting our relationship. But my family is not ready to hear anything.

Hello abcd_03,

Here you have just talked about your family and problems in your home concerning your relationship with your boyfriend. Intercaste marriages have always been a problem.

There are two things that you can do :

1) Request your parents to accept this relationship. Tell them that they have done it before and you don't appreciate them ruining your life only because some third person (your "chacha") has problems with this relationship. Tell them that, its your life and its your parents who can decide whom you have to marry and whom you have to reject, not any third person in the family. Moreover you can have a talk with your chacha directly and explain things to him directly and in person. Tell him and make him realize that your boyfriend is the only one made for you. If he doesn't agree with you initially, you can also arrange a meeting between your boyfriend and your family (particularly comprising of, your parents and your chacha) and let them then decide what they want to do.

2) The most important part here is that does your boyfriend family accepts you or not ? Even if you have convinced your parents, there is another milestone to cover and that is convincing your boyfriend's parents. So, if things dont work out here in your family, you can start things up on the other front i.e. the boy's side. Try to convince his parents and if you succeed in doing that, half the battle is won. You can then allow both the families to meet and decide your fate on their own. Ask your boyfriend to help you out in this too. Love can become a successful story only through mutual interests.

I wish you luck and hope you both come out with some positive results. Do let us know too.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHV063U2MIA

Thanks yahoo and pulkit for your valuable advise.

Can u tell me few ways through which i can plan a meeting between my boyfriend and chachu. I asked chachu to talk to him on phone. He complained about the same to my parents. Social gathering is not possible as of now, neither chachu is talking to me. What would be the best way for us to approach him at this point?

Hi , your Chachu is not issue, explain your parents what is your need.

plss tell how u convinced ur chachu...parents...this is my story...pls help me too..pls..