Losing my 6 years love for his adamant parents

Hello friends, I am a 25 yrs female working in an MNC, I am in love with a guy for the past 6 years now. We were from the same college and now working in the same company. We disclosed to our parents about our love last year, initially my parents were not accepting but as the days passed by they are ok with the marriage to see me smiling. At the guys place, his parents are dead against our marriage, he is the only son. When he discussed about the marriage, he was asked to leave the house if my name is uttered also. He has been convincing them but no success. There are 2 issues that i know why parents are against our marriage. 1. Horoscope issue: We both are from the same GOTRAM (both of us are bhramins though) 2. I am elder to him by 8 months (which they came to know few days back). There could be many other things that i don't know. From the beginning we both always wanted to convince parents and marry but not go against them. Now that the time is come, we are not able to break up nor stay together. I had suicidal tendency when we discussed and understood that breakup is the only option left. We are not able to talk from 2 months because of his parents. My parents are searching for a groom. Both of us are really messed up. Is there anything that we can do to convince his parents? Can you advice please. We cannot elope and marry. He is asking me to talk to his parents thinking they would understand me atleast but how would i be able to do that? plz help. :'(

Hello lostmylove,

I understand it is a very hard phase you are going through and its quiet genuine for you to feel suicidal but you should understand it is ofcourse not a solution to the problem. so, let this thought of suiciding go from your mind and think positively.

Try to understand, you are standing at the point where if you let it go, things will never fall in your way, but if you fight for it assertively, there might be chances that you'll win.
Now, coming to the main point, what you can do? Well, its a somewhat good sign tht your parents are ready for the match. Initially what you should do is, ask your boyfriend to organize a meeting of you with his parents to talk on this issue. There might be a setback initially and his parents might say No to the meeting as well, but realize this, you are in love and you have to fight for it. So, wait a while and start afresh. Make them know the worth of your relationship and how much involved you both are in it. Let them know the level of commitment you both have for you and make them understand that if they do not agree to marry you to their son, then it might be difficult for their son and you as well to get married to someone else. It will be difficult for their son to love someone else, the new girl who will be entering his life, and that she will never be happy with him. Let them know they have no rights to ruin the life of three individuals for a mere sake of their wish or may be for the reasons you have provided above.

Let them know caste system holds no value today and considering the age difference, there are marriages in past where the guy is younger than the girl. What matters in a marriage is that both the individuals respect each other's differences and enjoy the similarities.

This is how you can try to convince them. Realize that they are parents, you need to provide them emotional and practical reasons to convince them. But all this can be done only when you get a chance to talk to them and this can only be done by your boyfriend.


Just in case, if they disagree to meet you even, you can ask your parents to initiate a talk with them and try to convince them for this match. Leave the matter on the elders to discuss and decide which I feel would be the last step for making this relatonship work out. All you can do after that is wait for the time when things improve. And if they are very adamant on not marrying their son to you, then I feel the better would be to call off this relationship. This should be your course of action. Also, you can involve some friends, may be a mediator or a common person between you both to help you out in this, if possible.

I wish you luck !!

Dear,
I am standing at the same phase. ME n my Gf wants to get married. but her parents are not agreeing bz of horoscope. Surprisingly we had met only 2.5 mnths back tht to with the help of parents. It was suppose to be a arrange marriage. but now its love...
I havnt lose my hope. tomrw i am going to talk to her parents... BE brave be bold, write your own destiny.

All the very best dear friend. I wish you both have smiles throughout together. I know how it feels to act everything is okay when nothing is. You are the man, who is atleast taking a step to keep the relation alive. Never leave her hand come what may. Live my missed love life also :) God bless you both.

Thanks buddy...

BTW i met her yestrdy... she promised me tht she will convince her parents, we have decided to create tht consition instead i will go to meet her parents, they will cal me at her home to meet up..
my hope s everythng for me....

RAhul

Hi lostmylove,

I would appreciate if you can provide us with a followup on our post to let us know as to what is happening at your end.

@rahuljain.me : You can start up a new thread in your name as well.

You may browse this link below:
http://etalkindia.com/talk/love-frie...ds-dr-sky.html

hi rahuljain...m a girl in a similar situation...was supposed to b arranged mrg..but now its love.his parents r not agreeing for a slight difference in caste.da guy loves me a lot but not able to convince his parents...dunno wat to do!!wats up at ur end?met her parents??i wish u alll da best nd i pray dat ur girls parents agree...have a grt life ahead