I am an introvert by nature. I never used to take interest in girls(not that I didn’t feel attracted to them). A strange thing has occurred to me over the past 1.5 years.
I joined a company and went for training. A girl was also there in my group. I never showed any interest in her. She spoke to me quite a few times and I answered only what she asked. 1 month passed. She started searching for me by shouting my name in an apartment. There were many 2 girls and one was with her boyfriend at that time in the apartment. When I responded to her call, she smiled and told that she thought that I was not there. Many times thereafter, I smiled at her when I saw her and she also smiled back. 4-5 months passed. Suddenly, she says hi to me while looking around as if to check if anybody’s present.5-6 months passed. She looks at me and starts smiling. I started looking downwards in embarrassment, but she continued to smile. 2-3 days afterwards. She looks at me and I also keep looking at her and this goes on for about 30-35 secs. Eventually, I look away and leave. I can’t talk to her when she is around because I feel very nervous.
Of late,I have started developing affectionate feelings for her. My mind is always filled up with her smiling face. I sometimes pray for her also which is really odd because I don’t even pray for myself. I am really confused. Is she really interested in me? She is beautiful and very successful in her career. Many guys are interested in her. I am kind of a loser and I don’t think that I will ever marry. I can’t find any reason for her good behavior towards me. I feel gulity because I am not supposed to waste my time in such things and my family doesn't support any boy-girl relationship.I have tried techniques like meditation,yoga to forget her but can't.
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