One side love hurts - she ignored me and asked me to go away.

A GUY · 01-09-2014, 06:20 AM

Hi friends ,
it was an accident that i visited this site . But when i saw that many people have shared there love stories so i couldn't control myself from sharing mine one .

This all started on the 2nd year of my graduation ,when a new girl (i call her STAR) entered in class, i was not that ATTRACTED towards her , But was confused why did some one took admission for 2nd year in our college .
Few days passed by , i just came to know that mine STAR didn't had some particular course in her previous college to major ,so she joined in our college.

One day morning , I was waiting for mine bus to go to college , and for mine surprise STAR also was there in the bus stop.
Form next day onwards we use to be in same bus {up - down route } , But we both use to not talk , in college also and in bus also.
But as months pass by , i don't know i suddenly started to like her , and with no time i understood it is love, not it kind of worried to love some with whom to you don't even talk.
but i knew have to start talking at-least.
so i started to with notes-> doubts --> jokes --> Friends {all this took hardly a week } but mine love for her was more than 9 months old.
as we became friends we started chating on Facebook {very little } .But one of my friend who knew that i like STAR told me that i should tell her mine felling to her . LET ME TELL YOU IT WAS JUST 15 DAYS PAST AFTER ME AND STAR STARTED TALKING. But i don't what happened to me that day itself i proposed on bus stand .
she did not replied to me. But from her expression i knew what was the answer .
i did not go college for next few days.
but when i went to college that day i tried to say sorry to her but she ignored me.
But on the same bus stand once again i went and told he SORRY for that day .
"BUT IN REPLY SHE SAID I WAS HARASSING HER , AND I SHOULD GET AWAY FROM HER"
BY far this was the harshest words ever used on me by any girl ..

FROM THAT DAY ONWARDS WE BOTH NEGLECT EACH OTHER.

NOW WE BOTH ARE SAME UNIVERSITY . BUT WE NEVER TALK TO EACH OTHER .
ITS BEEN PAINFUL 3 YEARS FROM THAT DAY
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT WOULD BE THE FUTURE , BUT WHAT I KNOW IS THAT IS MINE FIRST AND LAST LOVE WAS AND WILL ALWAYS WOULD BE HER"

DO ANYONE ELSE THINK SO ?

01-09-2014, 05:02 PM

Hi A GUY,

She did the best what she could. I mean, what else do you expect from a girl in this situation where a guy who she barely know proposed her and then said sorry, just to retain her company? In fact, in an attempt to propose her and make an impression on her, you landed yourself projecting as a "jerk"( Sorry for that word. Please do not mind ! ).

Couple of things that I want you to know :

1) When it comes to relationships and love, try to give sometime to yourself and your partner so that you guys develop a mutual understanding for each other. There is a very thin line of difference between Love and Infatuation and people of your age, usually fail to understand this gap. As its said, everything that glitters is not gold, similarly, every lovely feeling is not love.
For a nice relationship to build, its very very important that you guys know each other in-out - your mutual interests, your likes and dislikes, your differences, etc. And for all this, its very essential that you become good friends, first, before entering in a relationship. So, next time, please do not haste and do things in a blink. Instead, take sometime to first be sure whether it's love or infatuation. Then, give some amount of time ( months or perhaps an year ) to yourself and your partner to know each other well. When you feel you guys have become really good friends and enjoy each other's company, that should be the time when you should propose your love to your partner.

2) We guys have a feeling of fear when we propose a girl. This fear can be anything - the fear to get beaten up on face in public or get insulted upon or this fear can be the fear of loosing a very good friend if the girl rejects our proposal. Almost every guy who has ever proposed a girl, must have had experienced this feeling.
Now, the point I want to make is, that, this fear often compels us to say " sorry " to the girl we propose after getting rejected by her. Its not only you, but others do the same. When we get rejection, we apologize for what we did to the girl in a fear of loosing her. Ofcourse, who wouldn't want his/her love interest to stay with me, atleast as a friend? Yes, we all do.

But, the point is, this practice is not good. When we say "sorry" after getting rejected, we in a way, insult this beautiful feeling called Love. When you propose your love to someone, you actually do it with an intention of committing with that person for lifelong. And, when you say "sorry" to him/her, you actually contradict your previous statement, which creates an unnecessary doubt in that person's mind about your credibility.

Very essentially, if you feel you are in love, speak your heart out to her. Go to her propose her without the fear of getting rejected or insulted upon. Thumb rule, confessing your love to someone is not a crime and nobody is going to put you behind the bars. Just do it, do it straight and seriously. Post your confession, give her sometime to understand, analyse and evaluate you as her boyfriend/husband/partner and come out with an answer. Do not expect her to say "yes" or "no", spontaneously. You have done your job of confessing your love to her. Now, give her time to decide and come out with an answer.

3) Fancy enough, I personally do not believe, Love happens only once in life. Love is a feeling which can happen to you almost every time you want it to happen. It can be felt every time, if you allow yourself to feel it. Life is what you project it. It's a mix of your ideologies, thinking, attitude and mindset. If you want to live life, you can.
So, getting rejected once or twice doesn't mean you're not meant for love. You definitely are, provided things happen at the right time and with the right person.

Go out and Love. Enjoy your Life. If you face further difficulties, we are here to help you out in best possible way, Anytime.

01-10-2014, 04:26 AM

me = A GUY.

thanks for ur reply PULKIT.
MINE was a LOVE not infatuation { i know the difference }
but u know that day when said sorry to her in case i hurt-ed her felling, but i made it clear for me she was and will be only one in my life . i asked her that i can wait for as many years .
its been 3 years and still counting . every day i see her but she ignores me, as you know that she said i harassed her . so i try to keep as much distance i can keep between us.
dont that all will make me look like a gentleman or as u said "jerk".
i seriously want to know what to do now .
to give respect to her words and stay away from her. or try to talk to her {which i dont know how will happen ? }

01-27-2014, 06:15 PM

Hi A Guy

Her ignorance towards you clearly means she is not at all and was never interested in you. Its good that you respect her words and you're keeping up with that.
I really don't see much hope in here but just for the sake of Love, I should say, you can go and talk to her. Its been 3 years since you guys are separated, post that incident, which is a very long time. Definitely, in all these years she must have seen you growing up as a more of a responsible and mature human being and her thinking about you should have changed by now.

You can do something, take sometime out. Go to her when she's alone, sit and talk to her. DON'T just bump into your feelings at once. In your first meeting your prime agenda should be to repair the previous faults and not replace things. I hope you're understanding what I mean here. Say sorry, apologize for what happened back then, ask her to handle things in a more mature manner, stay calm and give her time to think. What many people would do is stand there waiting for a reply. Just say your words and move out, thereby, giving her the space and time to think about it. Tell her that you guys have entered in the last phase of your graduation and you want to take good memories back home. You want to make friends with everybody you know because these moments are not going to come back. You know.... just do a little bit of emotional talks and bring her down. I'm sure an intelligent person like you will easily do it. Feel it from within.

Let's hope for the best !!!

01-28-2014, 06:32 AM

thanks man!!
its been long tht i was not able to open this site ,
but suerlly i will follow your words ..
i am just waiting for a right time..
wish me luck..

01-29-2014, 04:46 PM

Originally Posted by deepak1ash

thanks man!!
its been long tht i was not able to open this site ,
but suerlly i will follow your words ..
i am just waiting for a right time..
wish me luck..

Hi,

Yeah. And make sure that you do it with clear intentions of being friends. If things work out this time, well-n-good. Else, leave it for rest of the time. If you see her always occupied with her friends, you can approach her and ask her to meet you in private, if possible, for some urgent chats.

You have luck on your side. I wish you the best.

The website was perhaps down for a while. May be our dear Admin can throw some light on this.

01-29-2014, 04:46 PM

03-30-2014, 04:14 PM

i am happy to mention tht i finally spoke to her ..
but she clearly said nothing more then friends ..
my college is getting over in coming week, after that i dont know whether i will meet her or not.
i seriously dont know what to do .
pls guys help

One side love hurts - she ignored me and asked me to go away.

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One side love hurts - she ignored me and asked me to go away.

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