Fighting in a relationship is healthy as it enables you to air out your grievances that you have against your spouse. This gives your spouse an opportunity to know what you do not like so that he/she does not repeat it. Studies have shown that couples who fight and express their grievances tend to stay longer together than those who bottle up things. This is because fighting is a way of communicating in a relationship and communication is really important in marriage. However, after fighting you should be able to make up and to do so you need to know how to make up after a fight in the right way. Making up enables you to move on and re-bond as a couple. Here are the tips on how to reconcile after a fight:
Having learnt how to make up after a fight with your partner, do follow up on this advice as it takes two to make a relationship work. Hence, both of you should try to bridge the gaps whenever they appear in your marriage.
- Do not run. Avoid running away and not talking to your spouse as this will prolong the disagreement. In case you need some time to think, then, go out and give yourself 20 minutes of soul searching to see where the two of you went wrong and also to cool off. Then, go and talk to your partner.
- Show affection. Send signals of love to your partner so that he/she know that you still love them even if you are mad at them. You can do this by still doing the things you usually did for them before the fight such as making breakfast for them or calling them sweetheart. This will be able to smooth the way for you to make up.
- Discuss the issues that led to the fight. Talk about the issue that is making you fight so that you get to hear each other’s side of the story and be able to make up after a fight. By doing this you will be able to come up with ways of preventing the issue from being repeated and then, move on.
- Take responsibility. It takes two to tango so don’t put the entire blame on your partner for the fight. Apologize for those nasty things you said to each other and be sure to move on from that incident. More so, if you have forgiven each other, avoid bringing this fight again. As it can anger the person who started the fight.
- Make new agreements. These are necessary in case your fight was a fierce and nasty one. You should agree to always talk about things before they escalate and also not to yell when talking. Do endeavor to keep to these boundaries even you are pushed to the limit by your spouse. This will show how much you love and respect your wife or husband and strengthen your relationship.
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