When a guy kicks-off an affair with a girl the thoughts of a permanent relationship do not cross the mind so early (or so easily).
Many affairs fizz out soon and end up being just flings. But some affairs last longer and may morph into a relationship. In most cases, it's here when the question starts cropping up in the head.
Generally, it's the woman who initiates this talk of entering into a permanent relationship. Some guys may get caught unawares as they hardly ever consider “taking the relationship to the next level”. A woman is more likely to get emotional in the course of a relationship.
The critical question is that how should the transition from an affair to a permanent relationship take place. Some men give up their careers, families, passions etc. in the pursuit of that hot babe. Many married men screw their nuptial bond for this. These are certainly unwise decisions which hardly yield anything good. Most married men end up landing in a no man's land. They are disowned by both the parties and are left distraught. So a hurried decision would do no good to you.
Entering into a permanent relationship is an important decision. You must sit down and assess whether the person with whom you want to enter into a relationship is the actually the right person. We don't want you to think like a robot or as if this is a business deal but considering some aspects is certainly good. Also, don't formulate notions in your head about the girl. You have to remain calm all this while because any sort of anxiety might hamper your judgement.
Apart from the contemplation, you also need to talk to your girl. After all, a relationship is a two-way thing. Find out if she really enjoys your company. On a date, try to depart early. Say that something really important has come up and you need to make a move right now. Observe her behaviour and try to ascertain if she feels sad at your early departure. If she does feel sad and gives indications that she hates your absence, then you have some groundwork for a serious conversation about building a relationship.
Another important yardstick is sex. Both of you should be able to connect in the bed at an emotional level. If the entire process is effortless and you feel the bond, then she may be the right girl for you. But if you feel that sex is more of an ordeal for you or all you get is some physical pleasure with no emotional contentment, then it's time to give the entire thing a serious thought.
Now if you feel that she is the right girl for you, it's time to communicate this to her. Don't squander too much time in this. The longer you wait, the more stressed out you will become. At the same time, you also don't need to rush through it. Propose her in a way that wins her heart.
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