The Boy from USA said no to marry suddenly- yet said he loved me

Please advise:
I had talked with a boy over the phone about a year as he was in US and I in India. It was a proposal thru matrimonial advt. On the phone and chat he promised me to marry me at all cost because he said he loved me and liked me very much. In the meantime his parents and sisters too visited me and liked me. He came last month and we met for the first time face to face and then too he admired me and praised me and asked for getting married soon. My mother over the phone asked the boy to keep me at a city where i can do job also and not in his village. she asked him to either buy a house or rent ahouse and leave me there till my visa process completes. And he agreed to it. finally he fixed the marriage date and all was well. He had given me some electronics goods, clothes and jewllery too which he had brought for me from states. But suddenly four days before marriage he called me and said that I cannot marry you as my sisters are against this wedding. after that he didnt picked the phone though i called him thousand times and also texted to him. He didnt talked and responded. Few days after that my mom called his sister and she said that we cannot buy a house and this was a condition; the girl will have to live in village with us or at her parents house after marriage till the boy takes her to US. My mother agreed to this too and also asked sorry from them requested them for marriage. But they didnt responded in a positive way. Again my mom called them and requested that if they are not willing to marry then they must take their things back as we cant keep those goods anymore. to this she hung the phone. We also called the boy from other source where he accidently picked the phone and requestedhim to take his things back but he replied that he wont take them back. When I too somehow talked to him he said he loved me but cant marry me and to throw the things in trash. Please kindly advise I do not wish to keep his things. I wish to return them at any cost but how to do this. He no longer talks to me and has switched off his mobile his parents too insult us and hang the phone. What to do where to return the things? Or what is he upto? why is he not talking. No one in his family is agreeing to take things back they say that it is between boy and girl. Why is he silent. Fine he is not interested but he should take things back. pls help as he will leave shortly from India.

well dear first of all..............welcome to ETI.........comin to ur prob.........i think maybe the boy was willing to accept everything and also the terms nd conditions...............but someone has badly poked their nose in between..........secondly u ask him one thing is it thet his sisters or his mother who is not willing to accept u if it is sisters ask him one question r they married...........what if something like this happened to them what if u(that boy) was in the village not in the US and someone else would've done this to his sisters...............he will certainely feel the pain coz he's the one who has to live wid u nd not his sisters dear ask him y is he doin all this..........go nd visit his place meet him u have to do it coz widout ne answers u cannot withdraw ne conclusions...............right waiting for ur response ASAP...........

well i guess u r online do tell me more so that we can discuss more...........

Thanks for your advise azhar bhai. I will try to meet him if possible because he is presently in his village with his parents. I right now too called him up but he is not answering the phone.

i guess he won't coz now he has shame for himself i'm sure dear so text him u want to meet tell him u want to talk to him figure this out coz by talking atleast u'll get some conclusion and also a sol'n to ur prob what say dear.......

he'll surely read the text he won't delete it without reading it......right...............coz one thing's for sure if he say's he can't marry u then be prepared for everything coz i know it's painful..........so dear if u don want his things be brave to throw them if he refuses to take them or maybe u can dump up everything at his place and forget everything..........i know this is tough but u have to tell all this to that boy nd i'm sure it'll work.......if he refuses then do it in reality........

Topic title Modified.

well thanks ADMIN for the update...............neways shini............tell me dear is there ne improvement in ur situation..........

Azhar Ji, No improvement. He is not responding. He is not picking the phone nor he is replying to SMS.

The guy who left you in the middle surely feel guilty if he really loves you if he is not then you too not to think much about him...

After reading your conversation here it feel like the guy not all in love with you because if he loves he must be ended up with a reason...

If you call him several times will show your weakness and which will hurt you for long, So don't call him...

If you have his address than sent his goods through courier or by person...

If you really wanted to know why he dis so and you want the answer and you must visit his him and can ask question in a proper way.

Thanks Nupur...my parents too thinking of sending someone to his village to return the things...but he has told everyone in his family not to take the things because when we called his sisters and brother, father they disconnect the phone. They even told us not to call them again. But to call the boy and ask. But he doesnt respond. Anyways I am not going to call him again. And in few days time my parents will send someone to his village to return the things. I am very upset as my parents had done all the preparation for marriage and he has given me and my family a setback. And moreover wasted my time a full year.
Thanks. I m very much depressed and wanted to share and ask about this matter.

shini.............dear just don loose ur faith in u i'm not telling u regarding the boy but the self-confidence in u ok and dear one more thing love is divine..........pure and uncontrolable but if someone tries and ruins things u cannot u don know what's happening out at his end...............i think u should personally meet him and ask the reasons for his backout coz this was very hurting dear so u have ur whole right to ask for the reasons.........but i think u should go there personally..............and ya well i know it's tough but u have to do it it's ok that u he not talking and not interested one things for sure.........whatever happens.............happens for a reason so don worry maybe GOD might have stored something better than this for u so don worry mak urself busy wid lot's of work...........people around..........there are many things to do apart from these.................right.................so don worry jus take care of urself..............and ya do meet him once discuss the prob wid him..........tell him u both need to talk atleast for the last time ok...........TAKE CARE...........GOD BLESS U......... :)

Dear Shini,

I , being a father of two teen aged girls, well understand your situation. It is difficult to digest. As some one suggested, your parents must visit his place to discuss and return the material. For you, it is not that much important to worry about the material as they are just material which don’t have value –as the boy himself.

If he don’t want to talk and justify, what is there to continue..? It is better, through his thought it self. I hope you have been saved by GOD, before that marriage. I don’t want to elaborate. Take care. GOD bless you.

Probably you moved fast. You can send the things to him in the village address by post. Forget about him. It is not good to chase a boy. Do not be infatuated. And let your parents decide future steps. Do not worry. God can give you a better man. When the people at home, including sisters are not agreeable, life can be very hard. I think the decision was taken too hastily. God bless you

i think you are at confusion state
once again think what will you get if you send the things back?
just meaningless satisfaction!!!!!!!!!

because sending them back will continue your relation in a negative way
that relation will drop you in depression, which is harmful to your career.

i can understand,you loved him so much but your parents loving you more than him,
he respected his family than you but your family respects you
you have more responsibility to show your honor on your family.

marriage is not only not only the destination of a girl.
love,marriages are just parts of life also they are important.
but this time you want to share your life with a coward who will not protect you throughout the life.

you should prove yourself.
forget all the past leave him to his fate.

I can guess you are educated.
once again postmortem your past you can find what is the wrong you done .
I would find a better solution to your small problem.
if i hurt you sorry,but think practical throughout your life.

I thank everyone for their support and advise.

well what happened............dear...............ur ne time welcome.......so did u find ne solution.........we need ur feedback so that we can improve even more...........thanks..........nd it's k if u don want to mention it.........GOD BLESS U........TAKE CARE.........

Azhar bhai we tried to return his things. My uncle called up his sister. After hearing this the boy called me up and requested us to keep the things as he said that he never said NO to the proposal it was the family pressure that he had to say. He called me up two three times in between and requested me to keep the things as he wanted some time to think over it again. When I asked why he didnt picked the phone for a month he replied that because he didnt wanted me to get upset.
He left India few days back; didnt even informed me or my family that he is leaving. He called me up from US one day and said that he was confused and pressurized. Also he told me that he is not going to marry at all, not even me; and if ,then will think about marriage after 6 months. He also told me that I was a nice girl and that he had come to marry me but culdnt do so. After that he never called me nor I am interested now.
My parents say he has kept us pending. Anyways my parents are looking for a suitable match for me. I am not going to wait for him now. As for his things that will be returned in due course of time at his parents house.
here at this site you all are very supportive and I heartily thank all of you.

Moving is not a bad ...

The guys may be due family pressure did so... but finally he called you and cleared you everything.. that was really good and he cares you...

Now the current circumstances made u and your family not wait for him and you already decided to move ahead, Hopefuly you will get a right partner and remember one thing never lose hope
... God is always there to show you the right path ...

God bless U!

well SHINI.........nice to hear from u dear nd u're welcome here ne time k so don u worry...........u seem to be very tough that is y u could survive in this kinda situation...........good u diceded to move on coz the life nd time never wait for ne one.............so for now we all will pray for u nd that u get all the happiness in this world so dear take care and wish u a happy life ahead....................take care............GOD BLESS U...

Well Shiny, Good to hear that you have decided to move on in your life and get over that guy, and let the process of your parents go on for searching right one for you, till the time, if you still don't want to keep those material things that the boy gave to you, do one thing go and dump them to the bin you will then feel released from that world of frustration and you will be able to get back to the normal life and be happy and liberated best of luck for the future.

Thats an old post Swapnil..

Tell me about your favourite movie, check out link in signature.