Love marriage will destroy my career (same caste and religion)

my self hasan kahir
i in b.tech 3rd year..
i love a girl. she is same cast same religion as i m and want to marry her.
but my parents are not agree due to her ex
and girl's parents want to marry her with some other guy as soon as possible.
she dont want to marry with any1 else.
she will kill herself or do some thing to harm herself.
she wants to runaway with me.
as i knw that if i will runaway with her my study and carrier will destroy.
what should i do.. i also love her alot...cant live without her

Hello hasan,

Few things demand your attention here.
First, you are into a graduation college where it is necessary for you that you concentrate on your career and studies, which ofcourse you know very well. Getting into love relationships happen alot in your college years where we are not enough mature to handle the problems associated with it. The same is the case with you. I feel, you are thinking too much about your future and relationship right now when there is actually no need for it to be done. Hang on for sometime, enjoy your relationship, work for it to get strong and better and stop worry about the marriage issues.

Running away is definitely not a solution to this problem. It will put both of you into trouble. Moreover, your girlfriend is not getting married before her studies are over. Every girl has the authority to present her wish in to her parents about marrying or not marrying for a while. Ofcourse, its an understood fact, your girl's parents are not going to marry her to a person not of her choice and at a time when she doesn't want it to happen. Atleast, she can hold it for sometime.

That time would be enough for you to settle down in your life and start with new avenues. So, stop worrying about it as of now and enjoy your relationship to fullest. We will handle with any of such issues when its the right time. Don't hurry and don't panic !!!


Second thing that comes in the way here is, her constant efforts to tell you she will commit suicide if she doesn't get you. Speak to your girlfriend about this and make her understand, you being an human being can only try to your level best to make things happen. Falling in love with her was not something that you decided, it happened naturally and so getting her is all in the hands of your fate, your destiny.
Try to explain her, you will try your level best to make this relationship work out but her constant telling you this that she will do any harm to her is just not acceptable and its actually putting both of you in some or the other mental tension. So, ask her to stop saying all this and assure her that you will do everything necessary to walk along home with her as your wife.

Stay Happy !!

problem is this...that her father is unable to afford her study...he dosent have engouh money...she drop her study.
and environment of her family is quite not good.
her brothers wife's are not polite to her....due to reckless speech fighting....her mother wants ..her marry as soon as possible.
i think with in a year her parents will make her marry to some other guy.

Well, the truth of real life is that you should stop thinking this girl or marry her as soon as possible but you yourself is not in firm condition to stand by this marriage. Decision is yours.

This is only my view..

i will fight for my love....
i will marry her .
because ...life gives a 1 chance for love...if u loose it...u unable to gain it again
there should any way for it.
once my 3rd should completed then i will marry her
but i will never leave my studies....

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by hasan kahir

i will fight for my love....
i will marry her .
because ...life gives a 1 chance for love...if u loose it...u unable to gain it again
there should any way for it.
once my 3rd should completed then i will marry her
but i will never leave my studies....

---

Hello,
Whatever Yahoo said is completely valid here. Your words in your last post makes me believe that you are too much emotionally involved in this relationship or rather you don't know what love is.
What would your reply be if her parents ask you about your earnings, your future, their daughter's security with you, her bright future??
Understand her father is not in a good financial position and hence he would try to marry his daughter to a person who is good at earning so that whatever problems she faced in her life till now concerning finances, she should face it later, after marriage.

In such a situation you standing in front of them asking their daughter's hand without having any solid financial support for your ownself and her, makes absolutely NO point at all. Decisions concerning marriage are not done on future promises like, you WILL work hard, you WILL secure a good job, you WILL earn well, you WILL give her a secure life.
All your efforts might be drained out in one single go and then you will be left with nothing in hand.


So, think maturely and act practically. Hit the iron hard when its hot !!!
Wait for a while, ask your girl to put down all offers coming her way( because this is something she can only do ), introduce you to her family ( AS A FRIEND ), start working double hard to earn a respectable life and stop worrying !!!

Also tell her to talk about you in her house in a way so as to give her parents that you are someone in her life ( as a friend) so that when you break the news of her being in love with you, its not a shock for her parents.

Concentrate on your career and I am sure things will be fine !!! Come up to us anytime when you need help !!

Correctly said aarish and pulkit both of you, hasan, this is not the right time for you to act any thing stupid, you have your career on your way which can help you in future to settle your life with all comforts you need, concentrate on your career first, and as Pulkit and Aarish said, try convincing you girl to reject all the offers that come her way, because that is all she can do, and the other thing is that along with studies, try to look forward for any part time jobs matching your stream you can get, work hard and start saving for the future, as the question of financial security will definitely arise in future whenever you are upto her father asking to tie knot of marriage for your lives, and also tell her to introduce you to her family as a friend and also start talking to her parents about your future and as the time passes, tell them the truth about your relationship.
\