My parents wants me to get married but I don't want to do that. But I am now in doubt that should I take decision of marriage or not. First I was looking for reason to deny the marriage but now I am in doubt whether I must marry or must not marry. I am 26 and going to complete my masters soon, and after that I don't have any definitive plan for future, I may join a job or may not . But I am thinking to for Phd in filed of finance, that will take another few years. As such there is no burden on me for job either. but finishing masters my parents wants me to get married. now I am in dilemma of marriage or not. Now myself I am not certain if denying for marriage at this time could be a wrong decision for future. At age of 26 years should I marry ? Also I am in doubt if marry now and that too someone I don't really can be disaster my whole life. I have problem that I never had anyone in my life with whom I want to have a whole life together. please advice

hi Sweetie,

First of all, im not indian but i do know a little about culture etc there. I cannot say that ur parents r wrong to force u to get married as im sure they are only lookin out for ur well being. However, if u hav any doubts or are unsure as to whether or not u should get married, then ultimately, in my opinion i dont think u should go through with it. I can only speak from my own experience which isnt altogether too different but far more complicated, and ended disasterously. I know over there its quite difficult to go against ur parents. However, u need to look at this from all angles. If u r not ready to get married then u have to think of the consequences this may hav on ur married life and also ur husband if u chose to go ahead with it. i think sometimes when we are forced to do things we are unsure about we end up feelin resentment towards the people who hav put us in that position. I think u should sit down with ur parents and talk to them about the doubts u r having, maybe they will be able to advise u and u may see things a little clearer. But in the end i think questions like these only we can answer ourselves. I took a risk and paid dearly for it.

Best Wishes

Thanx Radha for your answer. You are right , if I am not sure then I should not go for it. but still one part of me say that go and marry and make your parents happy and whatever will come will face it. The other part say what if your marriage fails.. you will have to suffer whole life. It is your personal life but if you don't mind..will you share in brief what happened to you when you made what decision ?

well like i said im not indian but my soon to be x husband is. we wer together almost 8 yrs. when he asked me to marry him i was unsure at the time but basically he gave me 2 choices, marry him or he would have to go bac to india. dont get me wrong, i loved him very much and still do, but i just wasnt sure about gettin married as i was jus 21. anyway i agreed, we got married and everythin was goin great. of course we had disagreements etc as all couples do but nothin very serious.....that was until i met his mother.. she jus didnt like me, and i have to admit i didnt like her either. she would insult me behind my husbands back, call me fat, cheap etc.. she started to cause alot of problems in our marriage..too many to even begin to list.. ultimately her goal was to have her son back living with her in india and she was goin to do that no matter what the cost. she lied, cheated, blackmailed, manipulated..the most unimaginable things, she has done. she even forced my husband to marry another girl there while married to me, although i only found out about this ( would u believe from the third girl he was goin to marry..she had somehow found out about me and contacted me as she had a feelin his mother had lied to her parents about his past ) after we separated .. and now, just recently she has finally got her wish. he is back with her in india and im ere alone taking care of our 2 yr old son.. in the last year i feel as if iv been to hell and and am still tryin to find my way back.. i can never say i regret gettin married but that is only because i have my beautiful son.. even after all he and his mother have done i still love him..but now im left ere to suffer their mistakes while he begins a new life...