‘Death’, the word itself is enough to fill a person with fright. How the incidents in life, the circumstances and pain gives the final outcome of ‘Death’. But that’s the rule of life. Nothing lasts forever. Whatever comes, has to go. Whoever comes has to leave the world one day and we are all aware of it. Why then, does a person feel so bad on losing another person? Why is it that when a person dies, he does not die alone but takes many more lives away? The pain and suffering is universal, why then is a person filled with rage and their world comes crashing down?

These thoughts preoccupy my mind and I spent almost the whole evening thinking about death. Thinking about how the death of a distant relative has such an immense impact on me. I would have probably seen him just a few times, waved at him during family get togethers. His presence did not matter to me, so why is it that his absence has started bothering me all of a sudden? Why do glimpses of his images flash in my mind every time I close my eyes. Why am I filled with so much of sorrow? Why do I keep thinking with so much of sorrow? Why do I keep thinking of his young daughter, son and my aunt who will have to manage the whole household without him? Why do I think of her emotional state at this point of time. If I am thinking so much, what about them? What might they be going through? My eyes are blinded with tears.

Everyone who comes, has to go away. Maybe it happened for the good, maybe he had suffered enough and this was the only alternative available to him. But humans are aware of the Labyrinth of suffering. Well then, why should they cry when a person dies? Why can’t life have a ‘happy ending’ like it happens in movies. How can one word instil so much pain? Or is it that ‘movies’ are not reality. Or probably movies fail to show what happens after all the happiness comes to an end.

‘Death, Agony, Fright, Anxiety, Pain, Suffering’. Why this? Should we blame God for filling the world with so much sorrow? With so much pain that a soul’s life ends when they rest in peace. God wants us to laugh and be merry, thank him for all the good that he has done. God created the world with happiness. Then how did Death come in such a pleasant scenario. I am unable to understand the plight of an indivisual. God is thanked for all the good, then why can’t he himself be blamed for creating pain. He himself is responsible for all the pain, sufferings and emotional traumas. They say,’God is everywhere’. Believe in him, he will give you what you want. Then why can’t God give back the most important person of your life whom he has taken away from you. Why can’t he give back those moments of joy and those memories with that person? Why does he fail to do so? If he cannot keep us happy and give back that one and only person who can make us smile, then why do we believe in him?

Yet God has created Life with a rule that souls are immortal not bodies. If we know it then why do we cry when a person goes away? My thoughts are overpowering my soul. I feel numb and dead from within. Why do we remember all the lovely times spent? Why can’t we think and see the good in everything? Why is it just the bad? My eyes are blinded with tears once again. The thought of separation causes so much pain. The thought of his wife who will have to manage the whole family keeps coming to my mind over and over again. She does not deserve all this. But if we know whoever we have is going to go away one day, then why do we make the mistake of getting so attached to people that all we can do in their absence is sit down and cry, why does the world come crashing down? But yet, how then can we survive without having someone to count on, without having that someone to complete our lives? Maybe he was an angel, maybe his purpose was served and God called him back so he had to leave the world and go. But angels do not give pain, they are meant to keep us happy even after they’re gone. Then why do we cry? Maybe he wasn’t an angel then because he hasn’t gone alone but has taken so many lives along with him and gone. How do we as an indivisual overcome the dilemma of pain, sorrow and remorse? How do we get rid of this suffering? Maybe he found a solution to his labyrinth, maybe it was to move out of it, escape it fast and steadily, and thats what he did. But the truth is Life does not stop for anybody…Life goes on. We have to overcome this.

All individuals come to life with a purpose and once the purpose is served just like angels they lift their halo and go their way. But how can a human mind understand all this in the state of shock or trauma? But I just hope one day we as individuals overcome this painful feeling… We have to overcome the thought of separation but live for the moments of joy we had when that person was around…But yet, how can life be how it was? All I know is things are never gonna be the same, as time passes by, my thoughts overpower my soul, I’m filled with enough rage to make me sit down in a corner and cry thinking about life as a whole and the message life holds for me. Thinking about a different path to take but probably its the love and care from friends and family that will keep me going…Yet I’m unable to understand how thoughts, feelings, emotions, sentiments can be so overpowering and how they rule the life of an individual but you can never tell what those pleasant looking faces are going through deep within their souls.
-sethipavit