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Love or parent - whom to choose ? what to decide ?

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  1. #1
    Unregistered Guest

    Unhappy Love or parent - whom to choose ? what to decide ?

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    hiii.....
    I need help......:-(
    i m in luv wid a guy since last 5 years. last month my parents came to know about my relationship from some other sources, and they are completly against dis relationship due the caste thing. They are completly against intercaste marriage, they hv strictly said dat if i want to marry dis guy den i shud leave nd forget dat i hv a family, nd if i vl do dis dey vl comit suicide.I cannot marry anyone else nd cant leave my parents wat do i do.....??? i m totally lost, the guy loves me a lot nd he is giving me moral support but he cannot come at my place nd resolve d matter. i tried ask my father to meet him but he refused to see his face even. how do i make my parents understand dat its impossible for me to move on. i cant forget d 5 yrs i hv spent wid him. i m 23 now nd my parents are luking fr a match fr me.Day by day m feeling like dying, wat do i do........hw do i make dem undrstnd. plzzzzzzzzz Somebody HELP......!!!!
    I LOVE HIM A LOT........dere is no other issue except dis caste thing.
    We both are hindus nd of same category but caste is diffrent.
    What do i do wid dis surname issue....??

    LOST AND HELPLESS GIRL.. :'(

  2. #2
    Pulkit's Avatar
    Pulkit
    Pulkit is offline eTI Aluminium
    Hello There,

    I am sympathetic to you for whatever happened with you so far but let me tell you you are not just the one who is facing this problem. Almost every love couple I encounter either in my life or on this forum has a similar story...a similar nature of problem i.e. parents intervention.

    See, parents all over the world demands just one thing from their children's better-half and that is a decent, settled and happy life. Every parent on this planet wants his son or daughter to be with the one who can keep him/her happy and treat him/her in a way no less than they treated him/her.
    So, your direction to convince your parents on this relationship should be in a way so that they get affirmative on the point that your boyfriend is the only living person on earth who can keep you happy after your parents. Once, you are through with this, things will be fine. But let me tell you its not that easy as it seems. You might have to give it numerous tries until you succeed but atleast make your parents understand that you are serious with what you are saying.

    Sometimes it happens that once rejected and scolded by our parents, we loose hope and courage to confront them again, but if you feel what you are doing is right then you should re-collect your courage and hit it hard again, this time with a more harsh force so that people or your parents should take you seriously. But hey...that doesn't mean you start to fight with them or brawl over them on any issue you want them to favor you.

    So this is how you can proceed next time when you encounter your parents on this relationship. But here this is a need to tell you, the things that you have written in your problem statement clearly indicate that your parents are seriously against your relationship with your boyfriend. So, if things get worse and they don't at all agree to favor you, then I think its time for you to accept this fact and discontinue your relationship with your boyfriend. I know I am sounding simple but yes, sometimes you have to choose one thing between two. Since, neither would I advice you to leave your parents nor do you have the courage to do so, you should try to forget this 5 year old relationship of yours and try to move on. Understand that its life and its not just the end. Perhaps you have a something better waiting for you which ofcourse, you can't see right now but will realize as and when time will pass. Always remember whatever happens, happens for something good, which we get to know bit late, if not early. This is how life teaches us lesson and this is exactly how God tells us that he love us more than we ever understand.

    But before you read this and feel low, I would like you to talk to your parents again on this matter with a fresh mind and reinforced courage. Moreover, ask your boyfriend that only moral support might not be enough to make things work out and that he should make some efforts too. If he hasn't informed about your relationship to his parents, ask him to do so before its too late from your side so that if not you then his parents can handle the matter and try to convince your parents for your marriage. Okay ??

    Meanwhile here is a song for you. You can get in touch with us on this forum anytime.


    All The Best !!!
    Take Care !!!


  3. #3
    rahul_rastogy
    rahul_rastogy is offline Newbie
    Try making your parents believe in love and the purity in your love with the guy. Sit with your family and that guy altogether and try matching up everything and making them know that it won't harm anyone's life, instead would keep you happy. Hope they understand.

    _______________________________
    Love Marriage Problem Specialist
    Last edited by rahul_rastogy; 09-17-2012 at 02:12 PM.

  4. #4
    rahul4545
    rahul4545 is offline Just in!
    don't do love marrage because your parents are thik your future life. 90% love marrage are failure in india.

  5. #5
    Gremsmith12
    Gremsmith12 is offline Just in!
    i want to choose Love because it's my own life decision..

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