Hi
I am vakchala devi from malaysian telugu would like to hear your suggestion. i am in love one india telugu guy from guntur but working in malaysia. His parents agree with our relationship but my family is not agreeing with our relationship. it is because 1. he is from in india, 2. they are worrying that what will happen to me if i got marry him and follow him to india. 3. they are worrying that they would not be able to see again if i moved to india. 4. about dowry because in malaysia do not have dowry system as in india. 5. if i got marry him what would my relatives think off about my parents.(His dignity). i tried to talk with my parents many times but they are looking proposal from local malaysians which i did not agree for that. they do black mailing me if i still continue my relationship they would stop my career life and bring me to my home. i had tried to talk with my 2nd brother but he is also againsting for our relationship. i understand they love me but why they do not want to try to talk with him. now i am helpless and thinking what is the next step that i should take. i love both my parents and him.i want both.i want my parents blessings for our marriage.i love my parents too..i need the answer immediately because im in desperate and i want marry him by this year.

Hi vakchala,


Thank You for visiting the forum and giving us a chance to solve your problem. I will answer to your problem in points one by one.

1)

he is from in india :

Well definitely he is born and brought up in India but presently he is working in Malaysia and definitely he would never be willing to work in India after working abroad. Moreover, he loves you and it hardly matters where the person is from until and unless he promises his love for you is unconditional and true and that he will abide by his commitments throughout his life.

2)

they are worrying that what will happen to me if i got marry him and follow him to india :

This is very simple to understand and make your parents understand. If the person is working here in Malaysia then definitely he will be living there only. There is no point that he is working in Malaysia but keeps you away from him back in India. Also, if your boyfriend can convince your parents about the fact that he will remain in Malaysia for his lifetime because he has his office here, then I believe this issue will be sorted out.

3)

they are worrying that they would not be able to see again if i moved to india :

Convince your parents on this telling them that you being a faithful daughter also love them and will never leave them forever for Indis. Even if you visit India, it will be for a short duration of couple of months and not permanently since your husband will be working in Malaysia.

4)

about dowry because in malaysia do not have dowry system as in india :

this issue can only be sorted out by mutual communication between both the families. Your boyfriend can make his parents aware and understand for Malaysian culture and tradition and request them to put down any offer of dowry, if they are willing to grab some. Also, for you to understand, dowry asking is not advocated in India now. Its an act punishable under law and anyone asking for dowry can be dragged to court of law through a legal procedure. So, your parents needn't need to fear about dowry. I believe, your man is capable enough to handle and support a family all by himself.

5)

if i got marry him what would my relatives think off about my parents.(His dignity) :

Frankly speaking its your life and not your relative's and by that token whatever decisions you take should be borne by you alone. Make your parents understand, how will they feel if their dignity is intact but they loose the love of their daughter for them? Make them realize, it hardly matters what the world thinks about your relationship with your boyfriend. If your happiness is retained, there is nothing more that should matter.

I believe I was able to answer your questions too your satisfaction. If there is anything more I can do for you, please follow up.