Hi friends,
I was trying to find a solution when i came across this site. I am a calm , less expressive , "always trying to satisfy others "kind of a person.When i finished my schooling and joined college , guys where glamorous. i ended up being in relationship with a guy for 3 years but at the end , the relationship became complex ( he became dominant , suppressing me , treated me as if i am a bit inferior to him ) . A day came when he spoke of my parents very rudely and with the support of good friends , i broke up. The main reason for me to stick on to him was we ended up having intercourse.But i was not able to tolerate the suppression and ill treatment that i came out of the relationship. But then i started having all the guilty feeling of betraying parents , i lost interest in life. I started accepting to any alliance they saw for me mainly because i felt am not worth choosing anyone for myself. A year passed and i lost my self confidence totally - i slept a lot , at a lot , spend time alone a lot. Parents where involved in many things ( taking care of old ones , family problems etc ). Part of me wanted to better myself while other half always kept me in low self esteem.
And then one fine day , i met a person in a conference who talked to me out of curiosity ( we had to stick on the whole day in the conference ) . It was different because all these days i never talked to any guys or i avoided talking. But him , i found myself talking . And we became good friends after that . Months rolled and he was motivating me always .I was getting more confident and felt that life is much more than what i imagined. I started walking, moving out often , going with friends, Doing social activities. And eventually after months of being together , getting to know each other , he proposed. And i was not surprised because i wished that should happen. we agreed upon trust , self respect and honesty as most important in relationship and till today we stick on to it.
The problem is , my parents are kounder and he is a brahmin . My parents are not even ready to consider this as relationship 1) he is a brahmin whom they can never accept 2) his education is lower than mine 3) relationship lss than year can never be true love 4) their circle will never accept it and it hurts their prestige as they where searching for alliance for a year
ryt now they think its not a big deal to forget and move on. Am afraid to feel depressed once again.My guilt of hurting parents tortures me and the fear of living in regret for not marrying him also is pondering me. He is ready to wait as long as possible . though his parents are ok with his decision , unless my parents at least accept it , they are not ready to come and talk. Now am confused. Am confused about the entire system of marriage. He understands and is not forcing me to do anything against my parents. But am feeling struck and lost. vryone loves me so much and am feeling helpless. can anyone suggest something pleas
Advert.
Reply With Quote
